Category: no fear

Menaces in the garden

by Karen, posted in (it's all about the) food, gardening, local fun, no fear, raising chickens, relationships

The garden is doing great. I might have even said amazingly great, if my husband didn’t find the disgusting green tomato destroyers munching on the vines this week. May I just take one moment to say ‘Ew’?  They are very hard to see (think Where’s Waldo); hanging on to the stems their gross little legs almost look like little leaves. If you find one, keep looking…there will be others. These yucky little encroachers travel in packs. Check the tomatoes themselves as well; we found teeny tiny little green devils on the underside of some of the cherry tomatoes. The green devil on the green tomato and tomato branches are nearly invisible. They also do not know enough to stick to their own territory. We actually plucked one of them off the eggplants! Talk about adding insult to injury!

Do you have chickens? Well, they need protein. Maybe that will motivate you to put your disgust aside for just one moment to pluck the suckers off of your plants and into your chickens mouths…hey, circle of life, babe. Or, make your husband do it. Do something nice to–I mean, for him later to make it up to him.

🙂

While you’re trolling for protein for your farm animals, don’t forget those equally gross shiny (but not happy)  Japanese Beetles. Check the leaves on your berry plants. These guys are brazen. No hiding and blending for them. If they had noses, they’d be thumbing them at you (you know, if they also had thumbs). Show no mercy. The bug traps might catch a few of them, but most likely you will be picking them off and disposing of them to save your plants.

The garden is thriving despite them. At the moment. Here’s hopin’ we can keep ahead of them.

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The devil you know

by Karen, posted in family, friends, no fear, quest for the best, Someone's gotta say it

While I was busy, out living my life, my cell phone was plotting to thwart my happiness. Now, I never loved it to begin with; it was my only option when my beloved pink Motorola Razr phone gave out after we had three lovely years together. So, I never loved it, but I…relied on it. Using it several times every day made it about as integral to my daily routine as is my toothbrush.

Therefore, you can imagine my distress when I noticed a crack to the left of the hinge, followed by a piece of it breaking off about a month ago. I beat down the panic and continued to use it, looking the other way whenever I opened it as best I could. Then yesterday, when I opened up my cell phone to answer a text from my son, there was a sickening cracking noise, that turned out to be the right side of said hinge which now also had a distinct fault line.

For me, buying a new cell phone is on the same par as buying a new car. It gives me a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. It makes me sweat. I avoid it at all costs. As bad as my cracked phone was, I (after more than two years with it) know how it works. Getting a new phone means a new learning curve…the stuff of nightmares. Plus, with cell phones (as with cars)…the one thing you do already know for sure is this: It’ll cost ya.

Oh, were you hoping that the car charger that went with your prior cell phone, also a Samsung, would work with your new one? Were you excited when the store clerk told you that he would check to see if there was any trade in value on your old–emphasis on old– cell phone? Ha! Get real! Your new cell phone is worse than a new car in terms of losing retail value…before the monetary transaction has been completed you have already lost money.

NOTE: About that learning curve: got a tween or a teen? They will both already know how to use your new phone, even though they have never laid eyes on it before…amazing but true.

Clear the clutter: get real

by Karen, posted in family, Midlife Crisis, my one word, no fear, relationships, writing

I’m still thinking about my New Year’s Resolution: my one word that morphed into two words: Edit and Focus. After beginning the process of setting up a home office and the necessary decluttering that has come along with that, I am thinking it makes sense to continue the momentum that I’ve got built up and “take it on the road”…er, to the other rooms in the house. (Was that an original thought or did my husband plant it in my subconscious mind? Hmmmmm…..).

At the moment, the clutter that spilled over into my bedroom is reduced but still remains. What I have left to go through includes, but (unfortunately) is not limited to:

  1. Knitting supplies: Patterns, yarn stash, needles and other sundries
  2. A filing cabinet with warranties, extra office supplies, vital records, and infinite other minutiae
  3. DVD’s, and (OMG!) video cassette tapes
  4. All of my writing files, notebooks, journals, project ideas

I’m reading a book that mentions a resource that I was following about five years ago but forgot about: The FlyLady.  Ready to get real and get rid of clutter but don’t know where to start? The FlyLady is your gal. Her BabySteps will take you right from square one to the finish line, presumably eradicating your clutter along the way.

My other decluttering activities this month: still parting with some books (one at a time, gifting them to friends), still unsubscribing from automatic emails (this month mostly from foodie ones…yes, it hurts). I’m also trying to bring less clutter into the house in the first place (yes, that’s Bill’s idea).  I’m also looking at the clutter surrounding finances (mostly paper files that I’m afraid to part with).

P.S. Yes, I admit it: After I went through the house and retrieved every single book I owned…I found more books. 😦 Sad but true.

Setting up my home office, Part Three: Paint

by Karen, posted in Life in the cube, no fear, Work from Home

The walls and ceiling of the office-to-be are white, so at least it will be easy to cover. Earlier this month I went paint color shopping with my husband at Lowe’s. I spent an hour browsing through all of the paint samples. My favorite color is yellow so that’s where I started out, but then gravitated toward the lilacs (my favorite flower), the blues (my second favorite color)…I could have made a day of it. My husband (wisely) left me to go look at some tools or something while I basked in paint heaven.

When he came back, I roused myself from my stupor as he said, “Have any luck?” I proudly displayed the dozen or so paint chips that I had chosen, fanned out like a hand of cards. He looked at them briefly then pulled one lonely paint sample from his back pocket.

“How about this?” he said, and showed me a foresty green color. “Oh. That’s nice too,” I offered. “Well, you don’t have to decide today,” he said, so I put my paint samples into my bag to be revisited at a later date.

So I never did revisit the paint samples because day to day life got in the way. Then I talked to my husband on the phone from work one morning and innocently asked “Whatcha doin’?” and he said, “Painting”.

Whaaaaaa…? I thought, but did not say. “Oh,” I said. “What color?” I asked, feigning nonchalance. “Eggshell,” he said.

Whaaaaaa…? “What happened to the foresty green?” I managed. “I saw this and liked it better,” he said.  It really is just that easy for him.  My husband is spatially talented; he can look at a stick, plant it in the ground, and know what it will look like in five years; he can literally see the tree it will be. 🙂 I, on the other hand, look at the stick and see only the stick, in all it’s “Charlie Brown Christmas Tree” glory. Bill’s talent that translates well to interior design. He can sort through those millions of little paint chips and find THE  little paint chip of my dreams. More importantly, he can know what the entire room will look like when the painting is done.

It looks amazing. I totally love it. “Eggshell” turned out to be a pale yellow color, the pale yellow color that I was hoping for but unable to locate on my own.

🙂

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Next up: the flooring. To be continued…

A bird in the hand

by Karen, posted in chicks, good grief, no fear, raising chickens
The Big Chickens (including Pidge)

One of my roles is Farmer (well, Wife of Farmer, to be more accurate). As such, I have a morning (and evening) routine when the primary farmer is away.

  1. Get coffee. (Get coffee is always Rule Number One, no matter what). 🙂
  2. Feed the Teenager Chickens in the transitional coop; refill their water as needed.
  3. Feed the Big Chickens; they are now on a very efficient self watering system that my husband designed and set up (this totally rocks!).
  4. Gather up any eggs.
  5. Evening: repeat.

I do most chores that are part of chicken rearing without any problem, but have heretofore drawn the line with a couple of things: I don’t check the vents for egg bound chickens and I don’t remove the dead bodies from the general population. Those jobs belong to Farmer #1 (or my son does it by default when my husband is not available). In short, Man’s Work.

Well, last evening as I entered the coop with the feed scoop held aloft, the Big Chickens ran toward me in one giant chicken wave as always…except one. There was Pidge, laying on her side, legs out behind her, lifeless. Poor Pidge (short for Pigeon, so named because of her coloring and size) had not been herself for a week or so, but in the two days prior seemed to be recovering well and we thought she was going to make it. Just that morning she had flown up to meet me when I brought the morning feed out to them. I took a closer look at her.

Dead dead dead.

The cartoon-like caricature of death flashed into my mind, complete with “X”‘s where the eyes should be and I superimposed the image on Pidge. (The eyes really did look blank like that!).

As an RN, I automatically reviewed the procedure for the pronouncement of death and had a moment of black humor as I envisioned checking the apical pulse and blood pressure on the little hen. I reviewed my options: Husband and son both at work and neither would be home for hours. I couldn’t in good conscience leave the corpse in the coop with the general population for that long.

I was going to have to Man Up.

I recalled a female friend who raised chickens telling me that the worst part (of disposing of the dead chickens) for her was handling them. Her work-around method for avoiding this was to put on a pair of work gloves then get a shovel to pick up the dead bird and remove it from the coop.

I got my (husband’s) gloves. I got my shovel. I got up my nerve and I entered the coop. I focused my gaze just to the right of Pidge, picked her up with the shovel, and took her to her final resting place.

The lesson here? Don’t name your chickens.

Footnote: I just named a chicken last week: Coconut. I am ever hopeful I guess.

Coconut

Chaos Theory

by Karen, posted in family, good grief, Midlife Crisis, no fear, relationships

When everything around you is falling apart, it can feel like the world is going to end (or maybe you wish that it would). Maybe you’re doing your level best to keep things harmonious in your life, but then somehow you lose your focus for a split second.

You make a bad decision and suddenly all hell breaks loose.

It can feel like vertigo: your surroundings are spinning and you are unable to feel stable despite exercising your strongest proprioceptive abilities. People are saying things that you’d never thought they’d say. Worse, people are saying things that you never thought they’d say to you.

To quote the brilliant, insightful Talking Heads from their song Once In A Lifetime:

“You may ask yourself, what is that beautiful house?/You may ask yourself, where does that highway lead to?/You may ask yourself, am I right, or am I wrong?/You may say to yourself, my god, what have I done?”

So, to paraphrase the illustrious Heads, how did I get here?  Why did I do/say/think that? It can all be so confusing when you are in the midst of it. Everything can happen so fast that your head literally spins.  What do I do/say/think now? Maybe your body takes over and your breathing changes to rapid gasps. You’re sitting  down but don’t remember doing so. And are you rocking?  Is this really happening?

Then, amidst the chaos you suddenly become aware of the calm. The calm inside you. And in that space you become aware of a thought forming. That still small voice says:

You have no control over how this will all turn out.

You might think this would be a scary thought to have at a time like this, but for some reason, it is not. Instead, you find that it’s a comfort.

Shanti: “The Peace which passeth understanding.”  ~T.S. Eliot from The Waste Land

Change of life

by Karen, posted in family, health, Midlife Crisis, no fear, tweens

What’s the first thing that comes to mind when you hear that phrase? I’m betting that it will have something to do with a midlife woman navigating the perimenopausal years. It certainly always did for me. Now that I’m in the thick of it, however, I’m realizing that this phrase has multiple layers of meaning and can be applied to people at any phase of life, not just midlife.

  1. Graduating from high school (or trade school or college) will amount to a huge change of life(style). No longer confined by the relentless schedule of classes and homework and studying, I still remember the feeling of enormous relief that I experienced the last day of classes when I left the room after the last final. It was a weightlessness, a “lightness of being”. Freedom!
  2. First car after years of taking public transportation. For me, this also brought with it a feeling of freedom, independence. Conversely, I wonder if going back to public transportation after years of carrying the burden of the inherent (read: crushing) costs of owning a car today would bring the same feeling of relief that finishing school brought.
  3. Having a baby. I used to just shake my head at the people (parents) who told me over and over that I didn’t know what it was like to have a child and wouldn’t until I had one. Now I just shake my head at my own naiveté. They don’t say “A baby changes everything” for nothing. A baby does change everything.
  4. Job change. Really, like the man you marry, the job you choose influences every last corner of your life. Every. Last. Corner. Once you’ve chosen, it’s easy to get stuck. Sometimes you are freed without warning (and without any say, for that matter)…angst-tinged freedom.

Of course, that feeling is quickly followed by the inevitable “Now what?” thought that follows so closely on its heels. Here’s hoping that old saying is true: When one door closes, another door opens.

Brave New Girls

by Karen, posted in (it's all about the) food, family, friends, local fun, no fear, tweens
Cell phones swaying at the talent show

The other night I went to the Talent Show at my daughter’s junior high school. The cost of $5 per person was a bit off-putting at first, but when I learned that all of the money raised was for charity (to help in Japan, Haiti, and here at home), I didn’t mind. They also held a bake sale consisting of actually appetizing-looking edibles which made the $2 per baggie of chocolate chip cookies worth it.

There were many singing acts (encompassing a predominance of Taylor Swift songs), from a capella to karaoke, some singing solo and some (the less confident?) in pairs and groups. All of them were good, and two of them were excellent. Most of the performers were girls, with a few token boys thrown in like afterthoughts.  In addition to singing, other talents showcased were
  1. Hula hooping
  2. Magic tricks
  3. Gymnastics
  4. Flute playing

Initially my daughter was sitting with me but soon enough she was off giggling in the bleachers with her friends (as tweens so often are). While I was waiting for the show to start, I thought back to my own junior high days and they were nothing like what my daughter’s have been like…for which I am endlessly grateful.

These girls were mostly in the twelve to fourteen year old range and they were so talented! The flautist performed an original medley of music she wrote herself, and she played what I knew to be a quite difficult piece beautifully. When I was her age, I played a solo in our band concert: Yellowbird. A medley of original music that she wrote herself? OMG! Saying “times change” is such an understatement in this case I can barely get the words out!  One of the singing acts performed a song in five-part harmony… Hel-lo? Five part harmony? And they nailed it. It was incredible to see all of these tween and barely teen-aged girls trying on all of these different talents on for size, seeing how they fit. How confident they all seemed!

Back when I was in junior high school, the audience was mostly parents and grandparents of the people performing. This audience was made up of parents and grandparents to be sure, but also many of their peers, who came to cheer them on. This was a kind, generous audience that clapped every bit as loudly for the singers who were slightly off-key as the ones who were pitch-perfect. At one point, the audience opened up their cell phones in the darkened room and swayed, holding them over their heads, like we moms and dads used to do back in the day, only with lighters!

I periodically stole glances over at my twelve-year-old daughter with her friends, watching the show, cheering and clapping; a shiny happy person among shiny happy people. My heart was full.

So, I’ll close out with a quote from (who else?) Taylor Swift from her song “Mine“, dedicated to my daughter:

“You’re the best thing that’s ever been mine.”

Bin Laden dead

by Karen, posted in no fear, Someone's gotta say it

On the Channel 13 WGME News tonight they called the “Bin Laden Killed” story the story of the day, maybe even the story of the year. I’m thinking it’s the story of all times; the classic “eye for an eye…”  (Matthew 5:38).  Doesn’t it seem fitting that in Bin Laden’s religious (muslim) war against us, this age-old form of justice is was delivered unto him?

On the early news this morning on Channel 8 WMTW, George W. Bush’s statement was read, Bill Clinton’s speech…er statement was read, along with various and sundry other politician’s politically correct remarks. I was not quoted, but have decided to overlook the omission and offer my statement here for all to read.

“I hope that when they killed Osama Bin Laden, it really really hurt. I hope that he peed and crapped his pants. I hope that he begged for mercy, and when he saw that there was none, I hope that he cried for his mommy. Reports say that he was buried at sea. I hope that he had a lifelong fear of the ocean. I hope that they played the theme song from Jaws when they tossed him overboard. I hope that they slammed his dead corpse up against the deck (and then again against the side of the ship) a few times before they fed him to the sharks…only I hope the sharks just chewed him up and spit him back out. They don’t need that kind of evil in their stomachs.

Thank you, and God bless.”

Feel free to share my statement with anyone.

Write it down, make it happen

by Karen, posted in books, Date night, family, fitness, health, Life in the cube, Midlife Crisis, no fear, Someone's gotta say it, tweens, writing, yoga

Okay, it’s a book (not mine!) title. It occurred to me to apply the philosophy of: “If you build it, they will come” espoused by James Earl Jones and put into force by Kevin Costner in the Field of Dreams movie which coincidently (?!) contained a female lead character named “Karen” (not sure how she spelled it!) played by Amy Madigan.

I decided to build my perfect work day.

  1. Get up–not too early.
  2. Get some exercise. I like Stephen King’s idea from his book On Writing where he would take writing breaks and jump on the treadmill that was next to his writing desk (if memory serves). A little bit of yoga couldn’t hurt…
  3. Get some coffee–oh wait! That should be first!
  4. Get some breakfast (ABO…or “Anything But Oatmeal” :)).
  5. Write until noonish.
  6. Get some lunch.
  7. Check email, blogs, FB (you know, all the usual time-sucking suspects) etc.
  8. Read until 4pm. This is when I get to make a small dent in my pile of books, magazines that I am dying to read but have no time to.
  9. Get some more exercise…go for a walk? At the beach! Look for sea glass, sand dollars, unusual rocks and shells. Sigh. Life is Good.
  10. Watch DVD’s or preferred TV series of the moment (The Good Wife, Survivor, Breaking Bad) with my husband.

What does a perfect day for you look like? Quick! Go right it down; then maybe you can figure out a way to make it happen! 🙂