Category: friends

The right words at the right time

by Karen, posted in Angels, family, friends, good grief, Midlife Crisis, no fear, relationships

Today, someone told me something that I really needed to hear.

We have been dealing with an ongoing issue for years and things rarely go our way. This year there are some new people involved, one of whom we know from another area of our lives.

These were the words: “I’m on your side.”

After she said them, I felt a subtle shift, and my thoughts about the situation in which we are both involved changed.  I started having new, different, more positive thoughts. I felt less anxious. Suddenly, I started tearing up.  I breathed through it. Everything might actually turn out okay, I thought.

Later on this afternoon, I was in other circumstances that became emotional and I started tearing up again. I went to sit in my car. I called my husband at work, which I rarely do at that time of day because I know it will be difficult for him to come to the phone. I was lucky enough to reach him and then, for the second time today, someone told me something that I really needed to hear.

This is what he said: “Everything is going to be alright.”

Everything is going to be alright.

Speaking your truth

by Karen, posted in Angels, family, friends, good grief, local fun, Midlife Crisis, no fear, Turning 50

Over the past several months, I’ve had quite a lot to say about turning 50 this year to quite a lot of people.

That was then. Several months ago, heck, even several weeks ago, it seemed so far off in the future.

This is now. Now, it’s looming large, and for some reason, I’m finding that I have very little to say. That’s so unlike me! Usually, I’m “talking and I can’t shut up”–just ask my husband.

As part of my turning 50 and vowing to follow any and all whims that present themselves, I bought a half off Maine Deal coupon for a psychic reading by Melissa Boyd of Deep Blue Truth.

One of the things she told me (apart from that my Mom, Dad, and grandmothers were all there and said, ‘Hi!’ 🙂 ) was that my throat chakra was so backed up it was like a bottle neck. The throat chakra is #5, counting up from the bottom root chakra. This is (surprise!) the center of communication and expression.

Apparently, I am not speaking my truth. Who knew? After doing a little online research, I learned that wearing a particular bracelet–one made of Sodalite–can help. (Really? Really? If only it turns out to be that easy).

I’m willing to give it a try.

The big lie

by Karen, posted in family, friends, Midlife Crisis, no fear, Turning 50

“Effective multitasking is a myth. Would you want a tooth filled by a dentist who was talking on a cell phone? “~ Downeast Magazine, April 2012, p. 25, “Time for a Driver Cellphone Ban”.

I’ve been thinking a lot about this quote since I read it. And when I dropped (and broke) several of the vintage Pyrex bowls I had for years. And whenI burned my finger taking a cookie sheet out of the oven with one oven mitt on instead of 2. And when I pulled the vacuum over while vacuuming  lamp shade, resulting in a 6 inch bruise on my leg.

Of course, any midlife woman has heard the “Having it all” myth too, right? Is there a bigger lie out there? Well, apart from the multitasking one?

My husband keeps telling me that I have too much on my plate. Much of what is taking up so much of my time right now is beyond my control, but I am the one who has to deal with it.  Many of you are almost certainly dealing with some administrative thing(s) that you wish you didn’t have to deal with (like completing tax returns?). Add to that eating and sleeping and keeping yourself cleaned up, all of which consumes even more portions of your day. If you are lucky enough to have a job, that might take up the majority of our waking hours most days. Add taking care of children to that list…and your day is now about 24 hours in the red, right?

I was talking to my friend Susan about how to fit everything we want to do into any given day when our brainstorming led to a breakthrough: Maybe we should be asking a different question. Not, “How do we fit everything in?”  but “How do we choose what to leave out?”

 What do you think?

Mirror Mirror

by Karen, posted in family, friends, local fun, movies

I took my daughter and her friend to see Mirror Mirror today. I have to admit that I was disappointed that Julia Roberts was in the movie. I have a love-hate relationship with Julia: I love the movies she is in but I hate her. Okay, maybe that’s overstating it, but you get the idea.

I put this aside because I love the story of Snow White. Lily Collins (who is my new girl crush) plays Snow and she is perfect in this role. She makes Snow into a strong female who takes no crap from anyone. She learns how to defend herself. She doesn’t fall for the Prince’s lines. She gets him on her own terms. Just like in Tangled,  this is a woman who saves her man. And herself. And her dad. And her kingdom.

The dwarves are a riot, like a peanut gallery. Or a Greek Chorus. They have a running dialogue that sometimes is off camera but hey, pay attention to their comments because they are hysterical.

The only thing I didn’t like was the sequence at the beginning. While Julia narrates the back story, a series of animated characters are shown that look like mannequins. I thought they were kind of creepy and could have done without them.

When the movie ends, stay put. There is a musical number at the end sung bySnow White: I believe (In Love)’. It’s worth watching.  Full disclosure: I liked it so much that I found it on YouTube and watched it about a hundred more times after I got home.

Sometimes I get obsessed when I really like something.

Party!

by Karen, posted in (it's all about the) food, family, friends, local fun, Midlife Crisis, relationships, Turning 50

I have never had friends over to my house since I moved here in 2006 that wasn’t associated with a holiday or a kid’s birthday. So, when I decided to have a Creative Memories Scrapbooking Party it was sort of a big deal.
Who to invite was the first thing to figure out. I decided to put the question on Facebook and in a few emails first to see if anyone would even be interested in such a thing. Turned out, quite a few people were interested.

Next, I decided to invite only people who said they were interested (either directly to me or indirectly, through others). I was pleasantly surprised when several of them accepted.  Then came the fun part: what to feed everyone.

Ask anyone who knows me and they’ll probably tell you that I’m all about the food. Ask my husband and he’ll probably tell you that I’m all about overdoing the food. I decided to consult my sister-in-law, Andrea, who is great at such things. I took her advice to “Keep it Simple” as well as her advice about quantities to buy.

I spent the morning cleaning the house, and with the help of my son Anthony and my daughter Izzy, we got everything ready early. Then I confidently headed out to shop with my daughter. As the day went on, the cancellations rolled in. I tried not to worry. My husband kept me laughing with text messages and phone calls…”Hello, this is the Wells Police. We have a report of a wild scrapbooking party at your house….” and so forth (thank you, Bill!).

In the end, the Tupperware Party rule prevailed: half of the people who way they are coming ultimately will not.

It was great though. We had plenty of room to work on the projects. Susan, the Creative Memories Consultant (and my friend!) had done all the prep work in advance to make it easy for even a novice scrapbooker.  The lovely women at my party ranged in age from 13 to somewhere just barely into her fifties (you know who you are!). And because it is true that I am all about the food, we had the most delicious cupcakes for dessert from Somethin’ Sweet in Sanford (check out her Facebook page for daily flavors and specials). My guests even let me bore them with my talk about my Book of Fifty (the scrapbook I am working on for my 5oth birthday year).

I had the best time ever. Thank you, everybody.

The Hunger Games

by Karen, posted in family, friends, local fun, movies

I went to see The Hunger Games last Saturday night with my daughter and her friend. I did not read any of the books in the trilogy (really) and didn’t have any clue about what to expect. My daughter had read some of the book and her friend had read all of it (actually, her friend had read all of the trilogy). Most of the women I know had read at least the first book.

I really had no interest in them, and I am a reader, so my family and friends were very surprised. But hey, it’s not like it’s the Twilight Series (yes, have read all of those books and seen all of those movies; go Edward!).

So, if there is anyone out there besides me who hasn’t been initiated, The Hunger Games is pretty disturbing. It’s kind of like Survivor, except that the losers all get killed. The beginning of the  movie reminded me of the Ray Bradbury story, The Lottery. Remember that? The town’s folk all come out to see who wins the lottery, and the winner gets stoned to death by the crowd.

In The Hunger Games, the crowd usually gets to watch all but one of the 24 contestants get killed on Prime Time TV; it’s an annual event.  Grossed out yet? One good thing: the blood and gore (knife slashings, neck breakings, and the like) are distorted by a trick of the camera, so you know what’s happening, but you don’t get the full brutal effect. My son (who works at The Wells Five Star Cinema) enlightened me about this: it’s so the movie can get its PG-13 rating. Works for me.

There were more adults in the theater than kids, so clearly these stories appeal to adults. The verdict? We three (a 49 year old and two 13 year olds) all liked it…so we gave it Three Thumbs Up!

Go see it!

After the fall

by Karen, posted in family, friends, Karen's Kitchen, Midlife Crisis, the beach

I had a disaster in my kitchen today. I was lifting down some big Pyrex mixing bowls from a shelf, something I’ve done dozens and dozens of times. Something I do almost every day. I was lifting them down to put one back in the stack. As I brought the stack down to the counter, suddenly I heard a crash. I think I heard it before I realized what happened. One moment I was lowering the bowls to the counter, then next moment I had no bowls in my hands and there were millions of pieces of glass covering every inch of my kitchen counter, floor, and my feet.

I was shaking, so I just stood there for a minute while I took stock and tried to breathe. I know that cuts don’t hurt at first, so I was looking for blood to see how bad the damage was. Unbelievably, all of the cuts, and they were few, were superficial.

The damage to the Pyrex was worse: My 2 favorites bowls were broken: the large yellow and the large Amish.

I told my daughter and her friend to stay in her room. I realized my son was home so I called him. “I need help.” He said, “Give me a minute,” then came up, looked around, asked me if I was okay, then got to work. I would like to say that he helped me clean it up, but really, he cleaned it all up while I picked up shards of glass then put them back down again, still too shaken up to do much at all.

I thought of all that while I was walking on the beach later on this morning. I looked at the ocean and thought: The ocean makes everything better.

I was wrong though. After a few moments, I realized this: Family and friends make everything better.  I lost nothing. I have everything.

Easter

by Karen, posted in (it's all about the) food, family, friends, Holidays, Midlife Crisis, the beach

How do you celebrate Easter? Even though my kids are older now, and the Bunny has been found out, we still celebrate the holiday in much the same way we did when they were little. I make Easter Baskets of some sort for them. I hide eggs for them to find in an Easter Egg Hunt.

Tip: to keep your older kids interested, instead of candy or colored eggs, hide plastic ones with cash in them.

We have dinner with family and friends. I over-bake when I am entrusted with bringing the dessert course and then over-eat everything put in front of me. I always make “Church Window” cookies in honor of my grandmother. She always made them for me growing up because I loved them and she loved me. I still do the Easter Egg Hunt because my father loved to do that for us when we were little and so now I do it for my kids, but also to honor my dad.

I went for a walk on the beach this morning and was thinking about how Easter was my father’s favorite holiday (I think) and St. Patrick’s Day was my mother’s favorite. I wondered what my kids think my favorite holiday is?

Oh, fudge!

by Karen, posted in (it's all about the) food, education, friends, Karen's Kitchen, local fun, quest for the best
Lemon Kreme and Dark Chocolate Fudge

I took a fudge making class through Wells Adult Education last night at the high school. There were about 8 of us present and we had mostly all tried to make fudge with varying amounts of success. We were a mixed group: a few men, mostly woman, all determined to (finally) learn how to make good fudge.

We were sure it involved a candy thermometer.

We were wrong.

It involves exactly 5 minutes of continuous stirring with a wooden utensil with a flat edge. I own every kitchen utensil known to womankind for baking but guess what? When my flimsy wooden scraper broke a few years ago, I didn’t replace it.

Guess what I ran out to the kitchen store to buy yesterday?

The secret to great homemade fudge!

It happens that I actually do own a candy thermometer already, which (alas) shall continue to remain in its original packaging.

Anyone else have any secrets (or secret recipes) for great fudge?

Souvenirs

by Karen, posted in family, friends, health, Midlife Crisis

I want to go to Italy, but so far have not managed to pull this off (I’ll be a walking cliche and say it’s on my bucket list). Instead, I surround myself with some Italian inspired things.

Souvenirs so far:

  1. The Amore Dish, affectionately referred to by the gifter as “The Poison Plate” because once purchased and brought home, he (my son) realized that one may not eat food off it. (Note: I am a person who is quite partial to food). I solved this problem by keeping some of my heart rock collection (and other mementoes) on it.
  2. Coaster, pictured above (also from my son), which I love and have used every day I am at my desk since I received it.
  3. Gorgeous multicolored Italian pasta, Farfalle, almost too pretty to cook and eat. I love to look at them every time I open up my pantry door.
  4. A map of Italy, which my husband laminated for me. I hung it on the wall in my kitchen where I look at it every day. I wonder if any of the others in the family even see it?
  5. An Italian Santa Christmas ornament, which is on my book case in my office. I bought my grandmother one years ago and although this isn’t the same one, it reminds me of her, so I keep it there year round.
  6. Italian language books and CD’s. I used to listen to them when I was between audio books when I commuted to work. Now I just think about listening to them.
  7. Many Italian cookbooks. Many. Italian. Cookbooks.

Here’s the thing: I’m getting ready to turn 50 this year, and I suddenly realized that this was the year my friend Karyn and I were going to take a trip to Italy together (if I remember right; see here).

It also dawned on me that the time to complete any bucket listed items is getting short(er). Time to get crackin’.

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