Grieving my dead relatives, Thanksgiving edition

While driving home from work last night, I was thinking about something

Mom and Dad, way back when

from my past and wondering if I should share it with my kids. Now that my parents are gone, I realize that there are lots of times when I have a question about their lives and am sad because there’s just no one to ask.

Every so often when I was growing up, they would tell me something about their own growing up years, and more often than not, I would roll my eyes and wonder, “Why are they telling me this? Who cares?”

Well, now, having had the same impulse last night, I get it. They just wanted me to know them better, to know them (even a little bit) as real people, instead of just mom and dad.

I wonder if this lightbulb moment I’m having is a function of being in the midlife crisis stage of life. It’s nice to have the insight, but it makes me wish that I had cared a little more about , and had shown a little more interest in, what they had to say when they were here.


4 thoughts on “Grieving my dead relatives, Thanksgiving edition

  1. Hello,
    I am someone from quite far away. I happened to read your blog while searching for posts under the tag ‘daughters’. I found it touching because my mother-in-law passed away yesterday, we are away in another country, my husband couldn’t see her alive – yesterday he left for home. Now I am here alone with my kids feeling sorry for the mother and waiting for my husband to return. As you said I too feel sad that I couldn’t do much for her – I can conveniently blame it on many things. Well, that won’t take away the prick.
    I too write about my family and memories. I found some similarity in the thoughts. Please read them if you would like to, especially the one titled ‘Paradise Lost’. Good luck with your writing!

  2. Karen, thanks for writing this. My mom passed 13 years ago and so often I find my self in a “WWMD” moment. I did the same eyerolls at probably the same kind of stories, now I wish I had just smiled and listened. Youth is wasted on the young, my friend. Perhaps we think like this now so that we’re sure to share with our kids in spite of our reactions to it when we were young.

    I wish you and yours a wonderful and safe Thanksgiving. See you Friday night! ❤

    1. Same to you and your family, Judi. I think that it’s hard even for adults whose parents are still living to “get it”, so thank you for letting me know that you feel that way too. Hugs. See you Friday. 🙂

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