public speaking

Public speaking has never (ever, ever) been my forte. I remember the first time I had to speak in front of a group of people, in a debate class. I almost fainted from hyperventilation and sheer terror.

Neville author talk, photo by Joanne Nolan

As an adult, I don’t fare much better (on the inside, at least). I think I’m okay, or okay-ish, but when the time comes, it turns out, I am not, or not-ish.

Have you ever seen the movie, Broadcast News? The scene where Aaron (played by actor Albert Brooks) experiences flop sweats when he does his first live newscast? Well, that was me. Did I mention it was 99 degrees that day? The air conditioner was no match for the room full of people, the heat of the day, and my angst.

Turns out, it didn’t matter. I felt the fear (oh, man, did I!) but I did it anyway.

Everyone who came to listen was very kind and gracious. They all made me feel welcome. They didn’t mind that I had stop to blot my face a couple of times during my talk. Some even gave me some (valuable) feedback about what they thought I did especially well.

For which I am forever grateful.

I was at the local library recently to read some passages of my first novel, One Brave Thing. It was my first time reading aloud from my book in front of other people. I am not someone who loves public speaking. Actually, I am someone who hyperventilates at the thought of public speaking. Most of my life, I have avoided speaking in front of a group with focused determination.

Until now. I wasn’t over-the-top nervous at first, because it was booked so far in advance. When I thought about it, I thought, oh! Plenty of time! Breathed a sigh of relief, and stopped thinking about it. Suddenly though, the day loomed large. I was feeling distressed. I tried Bach’s Rescue Remedy gum that I found in my desk drawer, left over from when I took my daughter to Florida last year (don’t ask). It helped a little, but I was still feeling so very nervous.

I confided in my friend Stephanie about my angst. She said, “Just tell yourself: ‘This is going to be fun!'”

Could it really be that easy? I had nothing to lose, right? So I tried it. Every time the ‘OMG! OMG!’ thought popped into my head, I stopped, took a breath, and replaced it with ‘This is going to be so much fun!’