100 days of…WHAT?

IMG_9025I kept seeing the giveit100.com mentioned on…where? Facebook, probably. Finally I looked into it.
The idea is you make a ten second video every day of you doing your chosen activity and upload it to their website.
In one of the articles, a woman was telling how she chose doing push-ups. Day one she could barely hoist herself up off the floor but at the end of 100 days she was doing push-ups like nobody’s business, yada yada.
Well, that sounded pretty good to me so I signed up to give 100 days to some project or activity too.
That was two weeks ago.
I haven’t started yet because, despite encouraging emails from someone associated with the program to ‘just pick something”, I haven’t been able to.
Writing? Clean eating? Walking? Hula hooping? Gratitude?
I was paralyzed in the face of endless choices.
Until today. While i was out walking at the ocean today, the thought of what to do appeared fully formed in my mind.

Here it is: 100 days of meditating.

Wish me luck!


At the movies (or, Hell is other people)

I was done with trying to align the planets so that I could go see a movie with my husband. I decided that, if I wanted to see This is Where I Leave You at the theater, I would have to go by myself. I rarely will cough up the cash to sit in a theater to watch a movie, but for this one, I wanted to make the effort (Hello? You had me at Tina Fey. And Kathryn Hahn).
movie stubI was lucky enough to find a niche of time in which no work schedules, carpooling, medical appointments, or householder responsibilities encroached…so I went for it.
I entered the darkened theater and took my favorite seat on the left in the last row. As my eyes adjusted, I realized that there were four others in there with me: three women and a man. (HINT: This is where the Hell part comes in).
One of the women hacked and coughed continuously, to the point that I almost regretted declining that Whooping Cough shot earlier this week…almost. The other two women talked non-stop. The man was silent…until he wasn’t.
What was great, though, was that it was worth it. The movie was mostly absorbing and funny (reference: Tina Fey) and loud enough to drown out much of the talking. I think the best part, though, was that I could laugh out loud and tear up at will, without worrying about embarrassing various family members that might have accompanied me to the show. So yes. I laughed. I cried. So there.

Best line (that I can remember) from the movie:
“Cut yourself some slack…Anything can happen. Anything happens all the time.”

Taking the care out of ‘Healthcare’

IMG_8914I  presented myself for my annual physical this morning. This  year was less routine than the past eight because my beloved primary care doctor got fed up and quit medicine last year (sad but true). This would be my first visit with my new doctor-long awaited first visit, since she had canceled and rescheduled the appointment twice.
​I was called at 10am for my 9:30am appointment, for which I had arrived at 9:25am.  The medical assistant that came for me did not make eye contact with me. She did not tell me what my weight, height, heart rate,  or  blood pressure was, other than to comment on how, “Gee, it’s always high when you’re here,” more to herself than to me. She spent all of her time  staring at the laptop that she was typing the ‘secret data’ into.
The doctor, whom I’d never met, entered the office talking. She also didn’t take the time to introduce herself to me. She did take quite a bit of time interrogating me as to what my reasons were for declining many of the screening tests that she was offering but that I wasn’t interested in having. She explained that she wouldn’t consider me to be ‘screened’ for things. She spent a good many minutes trying to scare me into getting a whooping cough booster shot (“Whooping cough kills babies! Whooping cough doesn’t kill adults but it will make you wish you were dead!”).
Finally, she explained how I’d be getting a survey in the mail from them that would ask me if she had discussed all of these topics with me. Yada. Yada. Duly noted. Still not getting a whooping cough booster shot.
No one told me their name, except the EKG tech.  This occurred as an afterthought when she was halfway through conducting the test and realized she had not introduced herself.  She knocked the drape off of me and it fell onto the germy floor. She reached down, picked it up, and put it back on my legs. She also didn’t ‘save’ the test results to my chart (which I knew before she came in to tell me; I heard the staff discussing it with her for several minutes before she came back to say: “You’re gonna kill me, but they asked me to ask you to do the EKG again”).
That is actually when I left.

Becoming less literate

computerI have been noticing lately that my writing style has changed. It’s much more…staccato. Where did all the pronouns go? I often omit them now. I am noticing that sometimes I leave the punctuation off of the last sentence I write in an email-especially if it’s a period. I left capital letters in the dust years ago (hello, e e cummings? i so get you now).

My email communications are morphing more toward telegram than letter. I use lots of dashes now. Oh, and the exclamation points!!!!!! And don’t even get me started on the emoticons!!!!! :)

I suppose it’s because of presumed lack-lack of time to write-lack of the recipient’s time to read.

I blame texting.

Home is where?

Recently my husband and I took a vacation. This is news, because it was OUT OF STATE. Way out. Like, in NJ. Just getting the same days off from work together to go took weeks-and an aligning of the planets AND and act of congress.

What was better about Atlantic City than Wells, ME? Not much. I had to really think hard  for things.

  1.  The seagulls had black heads. Kind of cool.
  2. The ocean was WARM. WARM. The OCEAN.
  3.  The ocean was very close to the hotel; you could walk to it. There also didn’t seem to be very much
    variation between high tide and low tide.
  4. There were some different kinds of seashells from what I find here in Maine.

That’s about it.

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The best thing about Atlantic City? We were on vacation! We were together! That is all we needed.

Long time no see

dad (1)I went to see Melissa at Deep Blue Truth in Kennebunk today. I go every year (at least once) near my birthday as a present to myself. I always get messages from one or more of my friends and relatives that have died, and today was no exception.
When they come through, they always talk about something that is personal to me and to them. Something that helps me know that it is really them. Something that no one else would know. They give some kind of a sign.

Today, someone named John came through. Okay, so John is my dad, so that’s a no brainer. Melissa told me that he kept telling her to say ‘matches’, to talk about striking matches.


Last night, I was talking to my husband, telling him I needed to get some more matches to light candles, that I was down to my last 2 books.  I joked that I was just coming to the end of my dad’s stockpile of boxes of matchbooks that we found in his house after he died…in 1998.

Pass the kleenex.

One brave thing, part 2

I went to the Aqua Yoga class on Monday morning, despite my trepidation. I got my big girl pants on (read: found a bathing suit that fit) and I went. I pulled up to the door at 8:59am. This is significant because usually I am at least a half an hour early for everything. Because it was so late, though, I didn’t have time to hesitate. I just got out of my car and went right in.

As soon as I entered the pool area, I knew I had done the right thing by finally going. The instructor was playing music for the class and the song that was on was this: “Happy” by Pharrell. People that know me know that this is my new favorite song!  Because I heard the Happy song, I was immediately put at ease. I took it as a sign that I was in the right place.

Two other positive signs:

  1. The instructor, Jennifer, reminded me of one of my best friends, Karyn.
  2. One of the other women in the class reminded me of my one of my grandmothers.

So how did it go? It was hard! It was fun! Everyone was so nice! I wish I had started going (like the other women had) six months ago!


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